Gooooooooood Mornin Chocolate Bread!

So yesterday after four hours of sleep I awoke to, "Honey, Audrey's sick and I'm calling her in to school."

Wha? I blearily asked for clarification and was told she "has a sore throat and a fever of 100".

Ahhh crap. For the first time in weeks I was ACTUALLY going to have 2.5 hrs to myself while the big monster was at kindergarden (dropped off by Dad, returned by bus) and the little monster was at preschool (dropped off by Gramma, picked up by Grammy). I note all the driving b/c I can no longer drive anymore due to health issues. Add that to our teeny tiny condo and I was really really craving 2 hours ALONE.

So. The Big Guy zips out of the house to head to his day-long class before I was even fully coherant and what do I find when I stumble into the livingroom? My eldest monster in footie fleece jammies, wrapped in a thick blanket, in an over heated 70 degree condo. I check her temp and it's 99.2. Ya think it has anything to do with being completely insulated? Really?

Normally I would just send the poached non-sick kiddo off to school anyway but, oops, I CAN'T DRIVE.

GRRRRRRRRRRRR.

Goodbye nap. Goodbye catching up on sleep. Hello getting through the day without spontaneous combustion.

Somewhere around noon, I decided I needed to bake bread. I asked Audrey what her favorite kind of bread and true to Mendelian genetics the child immediately responded, "Chocolate". Mind you, I have never made, nor has she ever HAD, chocolate bread.

Sounds good to me. We winged it., basing it on a halved version of the Master Boule recipe in Artisan Breads in 5 Minutes a Day.

These measurements are rough estimates and make one mondo loaf or two smallish loaves - adjust baking time as needed.

Holy Moley Chocolate Bread

1.5 cups lukewarm water

2tsp granulated yeast
1tsp kosher or other coarse salt
1/8c dark brown sugar
1 slosh real vanilla extract - interpret as you see fit
3 cups unsifted, unbleached, all-purpose white flour, measured with the scoop-and-sweep method
3 tbl cocoa powder
2 tbl instant espresso powder (don't have it? see adaptation below)
1/8c raw or granulated sugar
1/8c honey
1/2c chocolate chips or chunks (I like chunks better)
butter for loaf pan

Stir water, yeast, salt, brown sugar & vanilla together in a 5 qt bowl. Stir in flour till mixed - don't knead. If its not wet and gloppy, add more water in 1/8c measurements until you have a wet, sticky dough. remove half the dough and put in a 2nd large bowl. Lightly cover one bowl and set in a warm place to rest.

To other bowl, add cocoa powder, espresso powder, sugar & honey. Blend in gently - it won't be perfect. Add more water if not wet. Cover & set in warm place to rest.

Allow both doughs to rest 2.5-3 hrs. For ease of use I recommend chilling doughs at this point, otherwise dough is EXTREMELY hard to manage... but I didn't.

Butter a large (or two medium) loaf pan very well. I use the Pampered Chef stoneware loaf pan and I love it.  Dump white dough out onto a well floured surface and pat into a flat rough rectangle. Dump chocolate dough on top and spread it out a bit. Sprinkle chocolate chips on top of chocolate dough (yeaaaaah baby). Roughly roll up dough forming a big lumpy sloppy log. Tucking ends under a bit, plop into pan. Cover with cloth and allow to rest 90 minutes.

Preheat oven to 350F for 5 minutes, 30 minutes if you keep a baking stone in your oven for heat distribution (I don't).

If baking the whole recipe, bake 40-50 minutes. Allow to cool COMPLETELY before slicing - it keeps the bread moist but not gloopy.

The I-Don't-Have-Instant-Espresso-Powder Varition A
(requires coffee)
~ Mix up initial white dough as recommended above, but only add 1/2c of water (dough will be dry and crumbly). Split into two bowls. Add another 1/4c-1/2c water to white dough in 1/c increments until dough is wet and sticky. Add similar amounts of brewed coffee or espresso to chocolate dough. Continue as in main recipe.

The I-Don't-Have-Instant-Espresso-Powder Varition B
~ Um. Just leave it out. :D